Can You Be Too Amicable in Your Divorce?

 Posted on December 31, 2018 in Divorce

An amicable divorce is often healthiest for both parties, but there is such a thing as being overly nice to your spouse during the process. Some divorcees give up too much during the negotiations or do not ask for enough information from their spouse. The process may have been peaceful, but the divorcee ended up with an agreement that did not meet his or her needs. Being amicable during your divorce means being reasonable and calm, but you must be willing to advocate for yourself.

Why People Are Too Amicable

Spouses should try to conduct an amicable divorce because they want to reach a fair and timely resolution. People who seek a quick divorce with little discussion or arguments may instead be motivated by:

• Wanting to finish the divorce quickly because the process is uncomfortable;
• Having a natural tendency to avoid conflict with others;
• Being concerned about pleasing others;
• Being used to being subservient to their spouse; or
• Feeling guilty because they blame themselves for the divorce.

As a result, an overly amicable divorcee may quickly accept a spouse’s proposal for dividing property or scheduling a parenting plan without carefully considering the consequences of the proposal.

Problems with Being Too Amicable

A divorcee may take advantage of a spouse who wants to avoid conflict by pushing for an uneven divorce agreement. He or she may:

• Hide or understate the value of assets, assuming that the spouse will not investigate;
• Claim valuable marital properties with little argument;
• Pressure the spouse to accept unfair child support or spousal maintenance agreements; or
• Give the spouse limited parenting time with their children.

Both spouses being too amicable during a divorce can also result in a poor agreement. People who are overly eager to reach a resolution may overlook important details when creating a divorce agreement. Both sides may end up unhappy with the results of their agreement because issues are unresolved and neither side benefits as they should.

Contact a Kane County Divorce Lawyer

Your divorce agreement is too important for you to rush through because you want to avoid conflict or uncomfortable conversations. The agreement will determine your financial resources and parental rights for the foreseeable future. Getting what you need out of the divorce may mean standing up to your spouse or having an argument. Luckily, you will not be alone during the process. A St. Charles, Illinois, divorce attorney at Goostree Law Group is your advocate throughout the divorce process. Schedule a free consultation by calling 630-584-4800.

Source:

https://www.reuters.com/article/us-divorce-mistakes/divorce-mistakes-you-can-make-by-being-too-nice-idUSBRE85P0W020120626