How to Tell your Spouse that you Want a Divorce

 Posted on December 30,2013 in Divorce

No one wants to be the bearer of bad news, such as wanting a divorce.  What people don’t often think about is that it is not only the news that can upset people but also how they are told.  In some cases the topic of divorce can be a relief to the other partner, as they are unhappy with the marriage as well.  Since divorce is a life-changing moment for one of the biggest relationships of your life, spend time preparing for the talk.  It can set the tone for how the divorce will be finalized.  Serving them with divorce papers without a warning can lead to a messy split. Part of the preparation for having the talk is thinking about how your spouse will react.  Consider if your spouse will be angry or defensive or sad about the news.  There is a chance that they will plead with you to stay together for any number of reasons.  Use all their possible reactions to stay firm with your decision to bring your marriage to an end. Then consider the time and the place for the conversation.  It will often take time to convince your spouse that the marriage is coming to an end.  Remember that you have gone through the emotions of preparing for divorce, but your spouse has not.  That is also why the setting should be calm in order to soothe the difficult conversation.  Also keep in mind that if your spouse has a history of violence or abuse of any kind to consider your safety.  It might be a better idea to have this conversation in front of a marriage therapist or in a crowded area. There are a lot of other things to consider about a divorce before you make your intentions known to your spouse.  Before making the split a reality for them, talk to a legal professional who can let you know how the process will play out.  Contact an experienced family law attorney in Kane County today.